American Sailors Love Beer More Than Women

A group of American sailors on shore leave in Perth, Australia listed their priorities like this:

  1. Eat an enormous hamburger with fries at the bustling Munchies van outside the Fremantle Passenger Terminal
  2. Grab a real coffee
  3. Shop for clothes and souvenirs
  4. Drink beer
  5. See a real live kangeroo
  6. Drink beer
  7. Dinner at a restaurant
  8. Drink the night away

Asked if meeting local women factored in anywhere, they replied only if it didn’t interfere with drinking. I think they’ll fit right in with the Australians. To reference another American icon, here’s a quote from The Simpsons episode Bart vs. Australia:

Marge: I’ll just have a cup of coffee.
Bartender: Beer it is.
Marge: No, I said coffee.
Bartender: Beer.
Marge: Cof-fee.
Bartender: Be-er.
Marge: (spells) C-O…
Bartender: (spells) B-E…

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People who drink light 'beer' don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee alot.
     —Capital Brewery