Alcoholoroscopes
I just ran across this neat site that gives you your drinking horoscope! Let’s see. My birthday’s June 21 (just in case you want to send me anything like, uh, booze), so I’m a cuspy. However, I’ll just go with the Gemini horoscope, since that’s June 21 is classified as there.
GEMINI (May 21 - Jun 21)
Drinking style: Gemini’s [sic] can drink without changing their behavior much—they’re so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it’s just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse and allusion, then doing something unbelievable in an extremely advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini’s [sic] possess the magic ability to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly, which is very tricky) with several people at once. They like to order different cocktails every round — repetition is boring — and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer, sauvignon blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.
Well, I guess that encapsulates the whole twin idea, though I honestly still find the whole field of astrology to be utter crap. However, it’s fun! Besides, what are you really going to talk about at the bar anyway? Giving someone an alcoholoroscope sounds like a better pickup line than, “If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.”
